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Brace Yourself

from The Best by Sweeney Toad

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lyrics

Brace yourself I've placed your wealth in crypto time capsules
We got no beef these rhymes I speak are simply fine cattle
Find unicorn saddles in the attic it's magic in fact
Encounter sea sirens enlightened with panic attacks

Brace yourselves stock your shelves with plungers for plumbing
Toilets overflow afterglow of the second coming
I've got rhymes so sweet I'm practically pissing out honey
I was named best rapper by the magazine Fishing and Hunting
I'm the best I'm the best, I'm the best
Got to get it off my chest, I'm the best
I'm the best I'm the best, I'm the best
Brace yourself I'm a mess, I'm trying my best

There was quite a big drop at the quick stop on lip gloss
All of a sudden everyone wanted to kiss cops
All of the husbands did something to piss rocks
Kidney stones and moans from their cis cocks
Sit tight in the train station waiting on a staycation
Watching DVDs of Three's Company on a PlayStation
You are craving the touch of a make up brush
Drinking Four Lokos taking photos of your tongue soaked in thrush
Hush my darling you're getting vax card carded
Immune to inflammation explanation flame retardant
Skid marks in the park from a bank heist getaway
Sativa in the Prius Hybrid is the same high anyway

Brace yourselves stock your shelves with plungers for plumbing
Toilets overflow afterglow of the second coming
I've got rhymes so sweet I'm practically pissing out honey
I was named best rapper by the magazine Fishing and Hunting
I'm the best I'm the best, I'm the best
Got to get it off my chest, I'm the best
I'm the best I'm the best, I'm the best
Brace yourself I'm a mess, I'm trying my best

Cooking up something good custard filled crab cakes
Delight at the sight of mustard in the grill with my pancakes
I can't stand fakes I only like real photo holograms
Check my trajectory on my go pro follow cam
I know my flow is the bottom can in the trash bin pyramid
If you think new vaccines are cash in experiments
Keep chewing that spearmint gum your dumb and gullible
I'll smash your colorful candy land board because it's fun and wonderful
Some kind of uncomfortable is a good descriptor of the universe
Awkward like your dead sister dragged behind a scooter hearse
Gawked at by the AIDS Walk passersby
Ancient alien impatient scaly skin pray us bastards die, goodbye

Brace yourselves stock your shelves with plungers for plumbing
Toilets overflow afterglow of the second coming
I've got rhymes so sweet I'm practically pissing out honey
I was named best rapper by the magazine Fishing and Hunting
I'm the best I'm the best, I'm the best
Got to get it off my chest, I'm the best
I'm the best I'm the best, I'm the best
Brace yourself I'm a mess, I'm trying my best

credits

from The Best, released July 8, 2022

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Sweeney Toad West Palm Beach, Florida

I'm trying my best.

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